Monday, February 3, 2014

8 Questions To Evaluate Your Inner Circle


"There are 3 types of people in the world today. There are 'well poisoners' who discourage you and stomp on your creativity and tell you what you can't do. There are 'lawn mowers', people who are well-intentioned but self-absorbed; they tend to their own needs, mow their own lawns and never leave their yards to help another person. Finally there are 'life enhancers', people who reach out to enrich the lives of others, to lift them up and inspire them. We need to be life-enhancers and we need to surround ourselves with life-enhancers."Walt Disney

One of the most crucial decisions we make in life is who to include in our Inner Circle. An Inner Circle can be a group of professionals, such as one's tax attorney, accountant, health and fitness trainer, or success and leadership coach. It can also include our work teams which we build and create. And of course, it will include close friends and family.

Years ago, when I worked with an architectural firm, our firm often participated in what our city called The Showcase of Homes. It was often required that we bar the entrance to each "showcase room" with a red velvet rope. You could see into the room or space, however, you were not allowed to enter.

Likewise as you and I choose who we will allow into our Inner Circle, we want to be discerning as to whom we allow to influence us. Consider your current team members, friends, and professional associates. If you were to use Walt Disney's descriptions utilized in the above quotes, how would you describe them?

Here are 8 great questions to ask as you consider your Inner Circle:?

  • Who encourages you?

  • Who speaks truth into your life? One of our friends describes a true friend as one who... "hurts me with a Truth, but never comforts me with a lie!"

  • Who believes in you, even when you find it hard to believe in yourself?

  • Who listens deeply to you? Who knows your heart?

  • Who is there for you when you've failed?

  • Who do you seek out when you need mercy, compassion, or comfort?

  • Who can you turn to when you need emotional support in times of discouragement or depression?

  • Professionally, who do you turn to for skills training and trustworthy advice? For leadership support?

Sure, it can be challenging and sometimes lonely to let go of friends and associates who have been a part of your life. Yet, as professional speaker Les Brown encourages us: "Some people should remain in our heart, but not in our life." In a recent video, Les Brown also declared: "Some people are so negative, if they walked into a dark-room they would develop themselves!"

"You need OQP in your life. OQP? Only. Quality. People"- Ed Decosta Executive Coach

As we evaluate our friends and associates-we may also ask ourselves: Which type of friend and associate are we? And... as we make the tough decisions as to who to include in our Inner Circle, we might ask: "Are we worth it?" And of course we would say to YOU... Smile friend... you have great worth and value. YES... you are worth it!

Your Friends and Fans,

Steve and Libba

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